Holiday Issues,Mental struggles......

BikerTrash

BikerTrash

Vet
Joined
Aug 26, 2011
Messages
2,121
This thread isnt what you think it is at all............
As men we have a cold outer shell,a protective barrier most all of the time , a cold sheen look on our faces as if so everyone knows to not mess with us or our families........As we are the MAN and nothing can penetrate our stone cold hardness ........well read on fellas,,,,,
I have been struggling very hard this year with some crazy issues in my mind and the closer to christmas the worse its getting and you will read why below.
So often we all take for granted what we have ,what were able to give and do , we have nice cars ,nice trucks and homes and nice motorcycles etc etc you get the point ...well
Lately I have been feeling very bad for old folks sitting alone at a dinner table out eating supper , The Old gray haired guy on the corner begging for food or change to eat ...and to stay warm .Why? why ? all a sudden a change of heart.
The little children with disabilitys that have no choice in life but to live with and deal with there disablitly forever and not complain or gripe about it but to just live with it and make due with twhat they have ...I feel terrible for these children and there families , What does a man do to help?

Last night The Ol Lady and I couldnt make up our mind where we wanted to eat?WTF? We take for granted we can eat anywhere we want to ,yet we still cant make up our mind ....I mean my god wtf is that ? Old Military vets standing on corners begging for a ham sammich and disabled folks that have no choice .......Damn.....

All jokes aside here but we have this Security gaurd at work ,we will say his name is bob .,,,Bob has serious disability some kind of MS or issue where he cant hardly walk at all and everyday this guy greats me with a "Good Morning" he ALWAYS has a smile on his face and is happy regardless of his day or situation he always is smileing ,happy and friendly yet he can barley walk to the restroom and he is never ever negative ,,,,Yet I have all the toys a man could want or need and I have the ability to run ,jump ,lift and do anything without limitations and I wake up in the morning with a terrible attitude and a lack of give a shit attitude ,,,Why cant we all be thankful for what we have and not take for granted it could be worse....

Last night remimber I said we went out to eat supper,,,,well this little old lady was sitting alone eating ,feeble and very fragile ,hands shaking and head tremboling she ate alone ,finished her meal and struggled to put her coat on prior to leaving ...WHY? why was no one there helping her nor did anyone offer to help her? What has society came to ?

This one is very touching to me , made me very upset and I lost alot of sleep last night about this one .......Follow me here.....

'We finished supper last night and decided to go to Walgreens after supper for some things,,,,,,,,,,well outside in the 18degree weather was a bell ringer with the little red can for "salvation army" foundation......She was bundled up so tight and had so many coats and clothes on you couldnt see her face nor skin .....But beside her lay and rest a Blind persons walking stick ,she had a small little table set up beside her with some things on it ,Her coffee cup , candy cans and some reading papers,,,,As folks would walk into the store and drop coins in the can she would reach over on the table and search with her hands for a candy can to give you , But nobody waited around for her to hand it to them ,,,,unknowingly she would reach out and say Merry Christmas to hand them a candy cane but the folks had walked off disregarding her good faith gesture.....I watched this for a long time ,each passing minute my heart grew stronger and stronger but all in the same time weaker and weaker, This lady was Blind,Old and freezing her god damned ass off to earn a few pennys from the salvation army yet ,,nobody has time in todays society to take care of these folks ....
I continued to watch peoples reactions , I watched this old blind black women all bundled up ringing a bell for people to drop coins into the charity can......
She would reach over with her hand searching all over her little table for her coffee cup , I watched her sip her coffee untill her cup was empty .....Never ONE time was this woman negative........Its 18 dgrees for gods sake and yet she still never complained .She would sing her christmas jingles and entertain herself whil ringing her bell ....Every person that would drop coins she would thank them and try searching for a candy cane to give them but yet nobody would give her 5 minutes of there busy ass fukn schedule ...

Anyhow , I guess what I am saying is STOP ,,,Stop the busy ass schedule take time to be thankful for what we have , So often more than not we all take for granted what we have ,We take for granted that were able to provide many gifts for our children , our families ....
I just wanted to express my concern ,the last few weeks its been getting harder and harder on me as Christmas is approaching and I worry what will these folks do ..Why should they have to be alone or do without and struggle to make it ....I dont know ,there is no real point to this thread other than I couldnt sleep and I had shit on my mind ........

The cold outer tattooed shell of me is an illusion I assume because these folks I speak about above are always and continuosly running through my mind ...as if trying to figuire out a way to help them all.......I dont know...
thanks for reading my mumble if you made it through it all.
Merry Christmas to you all ,,,Enjoy your holidays with your families and be thankful for each and every minute with them .....
 
very good post this post made me openly weep in my living room--thank you for posting this
 
More often than not we find ourselves passing these folks by with little to no reconginition /
Our busy schedules ,we got so caught up in our own daily shedules that we dont realize that there are so many folks out there that need help , especially during the holidays .
If you take time to see it , realize it ...Notice that the folks I have spoke about about are disabled on one way or another ,whether it be blind , or handicap or just a physical limitation of one sorts or another ,,,These folks I speak of are working ,there trying to earn a few dollors to get by and provide either themselves or others somehting of a sorts.
Its so touching and bothersome to me to see a handicap woman shaking a bell for change in the freezing ass cold ,Or to see a man with MS or whatver he has to be working hard for his money when he could be staying at home drawing a disability check but yet he works everyday for his earn....thats amazing in itself.The simple fact that they dont bitch or complain about it , rather they do it and smile , they seem to have a realm of happiness surronding them at all times and I ask myself how in the fuck can I be so miserable and grouchy at times when I have everything I need and yet they have nothing and there smiling and greet you with open hands.......

Today I am going back to that blind black bell ringing lady , I am going to talk to her .Im going to hold her hand im gonna tell her Merry Christmas and Im going to give her a Christmas present ,it may only be cookies, chex mix or some kind of goodies in a gift bag but im going to give her something , She god damn deserves it .Im gonna sit with her in the cold , I want to hear what she has to say ,I want to listen to her story and if all she wants to do in sing christmas jingles then Im gonna sit and listen while holding her hand so she knows atleast one person in this world is thinking of her and cares as if for just a few mintues.......

Ya know , some of the best stories I have ever heard have came from Old military vets ,disabled old folks or just the homeless hungry guy on the corner .
These people have stories of there pasts and nobody takes time to listen ,Its amazing some of the stories these folks tell .you learn so much from them and realize life isnt and doesnt have to be so damn complicated .

This thread isnt asking for anyone to donate to charity of any sorts, Matter of fact I have done the research and very little of any money donated to Red Cross or Salvation Army or United Way actually goes to those in need ,,,it pads some rich guys pockets and the money isnt placed where it all is due .

i guess what im asking from each one of you that takes the time to read this long thread is to ,,bake some cookies, make some chex mix , go talk with these handicapped folks or disabaled folks , talk the old lady who sits alone and eats ,Let them know you care , tell them Happy Holidays and watch there eyes glisten and shine while if for only a minute you will make there day and they will know that someone took 5 minutes to listen and be with them ......
 
Excellent post my friend! Several good points made here and I'm the same way I can't understand people and it breaks my heart to see how some of these poor people get treated..I guess brother you and I were brought up a little different than some of these people that don't have time for their own children much less complete strangers.. Thanks again for your post and Gob bless you brother and I hope you and your family have a Very Merry Christmas!
 
The thing that gets me to thinking hard is little kids. This world is full of little kids of all ages that live in fucked up homes. Whether it be Dad is a drunk or Mom is a crack head or whatever. They never know what is gonna happen next whether they will be hugged or slapped by the same person. I see alot of this and I bet you do too. You dont have to be hanging out in the projects to see this shit going on. And this does not mean they are financially poor. But they might be.

Then you have guys like my friend who we shall call Hank. Hank got out of the joint a year ago and has turned his life around. Tough to get a job with a sheet so he has been making it. Child support caught up 100%. Life is good. Then winter comes and he gets laid off. The only thing he is worried about is what he can get two little kids for Christmas with almost no cash. They live with their mom, but know Dad is on new footing and he feels like he is gonna derail progress. We took care of the problem for him and will forget about it long before he does.

My kids live like a box full of kittens. That does not mean they have everything and dont have to take out the trash, that just means they never have to worry about anything of any kind unless they choose to get wound up about something stupid. They know there is love and they know how I am gonna be when I walk through the front door. (if I am on tren they slightly adjust their thinking). But even then they have a life totally without fear.

I may take another opportunity today to see what I can do for someone without expecting anything in return, even without their knowing.
 
Great post! I couldn't read the last part because my eyes were too blurry from the tears.

Merry Life! Sharing some of the good times is what it is about.
 
Great post BT

I often think of this as well. I will say for the Pan handlers I'm a bit tainted. I once watched a documentary on this. There is so many frauds doing it it left a bitter taste in my mouth. Example in Hollywood an this was captured on film and the person confronted. He was playing the homeless VET! he had made around 200 that afternoon walked around the corner and down a couple blocks got into his BMW and drove off after the confrontation. Ever since that I wonder every time I see one.

As for our seniors and children. Always donate clothing and most of it is brand new to churches! This way I know its going to someone in need. Not the big supposed nonprofit organizations. As u stated above the money does not go where its said to go!!!!!!!!!!

I'm just working class but I give what I can to place I believe in my heart will do good with it. I have often said for years! If I ever hit it big or a lotto some thing like that. I would make it a point to interview these homeless people. An for the ones that really want to better for them selves sponsor them! What I mean by this would be take then in to my home give them a warm place to live a place to clean up. Get them some close set them up with a chance to succeed.

I feel that's plenty to be honest it would be up to them to make the best of the opportunity! If they show they would do good with that then reevaluate the situation if they do nothing then they deserve nothing.

As for the seniors there is much we can do for them. Hell spending time with them at a nursing home would be great for those that have no family. Imagine the joy that would bring them. Or the lady at dinner u mentioned.

Kids hell that's a no brainer give them all u can afford they 9 times out of 10 have no choice!

My family has over the years found a family in need. Maybe its loss of job maybe its just they barely make it with the job they have. We put together a few hundred dollars find out the names and ages of the children and go buy Christmas for all of them.

You haven't experienced appreciation!!!!!!!! Until you have knocked on the door of someone you have never met with a vehicle full of gifts. They have no Idea who you are all they know is someone cared enough about them to help. The looks on there faces is some thing u can not buy.

Not to mention u get a little some thing out of it also.

Phat
 
Really good post bro. I have to give my head a shake every now and then and appreciate to where I am today and how good in fact most of us have it.
 
We have an excellent group of members here, I am glad I have the oppurtunity to Mod here and know most all of you even if its only through internet ,A few of you I text and chat on the phone with and its an honor to have that connection and trust .
The replies to my thread were just as I had hoped, Makes me so happy to see everyones replies.
It takes such a small simple geature to make someone feel good about themselevs .
More often that not I wake up and wonder "what the hell else can go wrong today",,,,then without blinking an eye realize that so many other folks have it so much worse ......
Thank you all for your replies and taking the time to read through this thread.
Very seldom do I let my Ol Lady read my posts or anything on this board but today I let her read this thread. She got teary eyed and had a tear run down her face reading all this .
I do not weep or tear up but my writings above and the actions and seeing the things we see everyday bothers me bad,emotionally I have a hard time seeing the children , the elders the handicap and the others that cannot help themselves but yet are willing to make the best of everyday without complaining ....
I wonder everyday why?
How can we feed the needy in 3rd world countrys and not take care of our own American born heritage ........
Im done writing in this thread now. but Thank you all for contributing in it ....
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you all......
 
Damn BT

Saw a guy with his sign today asking for work not hand out's I couldn't help but give him some cash. U would think I gave him a new car. Was a cold SOB out there 25f

Phat
 
Great post bro. I came to the Philippines 1.5 years ago, and I gotta tell ya it is a reality check bigtime. People in USA don't know what poor REALLY is. If you have food to eat, a roof over your head and good health, you have it all.
 
Great post BT! I feel the same way and used to tithe at Church, but a maid at the Sheraton Hotel told me once about the time many years ago when her husband was out of work and then their house burned down, and they and their 4 kids were out in the cold. They contacted Red Cross and Salvation Army, but they were both over extended and couldn't give any real help. Then someone suggested they contact the Little Sisters of the Poor. At first Bonnie was hesitant as she was Protestant, but the LSOTP gave them food and shelter no questions asked. She was so impressed that her and her family later became Catholics. Since then, if I have enough to donate to the poor I write a check to the Little Sisters.

But when I see a homeless man in traffic I stop and hand him a few dollars, but if a person comes up and asks for money, I usually offer to buy them a meal. You'd be surprised how often they insist on cash only.

I used to work in some of the getto areas rehabbing old rental properties, and have seen some very impoverished folks selling food stamps at 50% face value as you can't buy alcohol or cigarettes with the stamps. One thin old wiry black vietnam vet named Willie once called me over to show me his "stash," 2 cases of MD 20-20, one red and one white. I asked him where his food was and he replied, "I got all I need right here!"

3 days later, my helper and I had to force him kicking and screaming into my truck and drive him to the Emergency room with near fatal alcohol poisoning.

He thanked me a couple of days later and told me "John you one cool mutha-fucka...you should've been been born a nigga!" :D

Sarah's always had nice clothes and toys and we either give those things to poor kids near us or donate to the thrift stores.

BT, I have always liked you, but this thread has made me realize what a truly remarkable man you are. It's an honor to call you a friend. Much Respect!
 
This really touched a lot of people. It did me. Look at the responses on here.

Just goes to show this site is made up of many good people who care about other human beings.

Thanks BT. I told others about this last night. We all need to slow down. It had a powerful effect as I expected.

I credited you as a good human being who posted on a site I visit.

The ripple effect is going big here. Good job BT.
 
Im glad you all opened your hearts and minds to a bigger picture that is often overlooked
It makes me happy and honored that willi would speak the good word about the matter at hand
...i am not a church going man by any means. Just hit me hard this year. Thank you willi for opening eyes and carrying my feelings into your words.....Thank you all for contributing.....
Remimber when life has you down.... theres others who have it worse.....
 
To be honest, I wasn't looking forward to the holidays.
I was complaining a week ago to my 12 year old daughter about how people don't even understand what underlies Christmas, "faith, hope and charity."
I told her, "Rather that drop money into a bucket, I'd rather work at a soup kitchen over the holidays, that's the kind of charity I'm talking about."
Yeah, after reading this last night I took a good look at what I already have and am overlooking.
As such, I stayed home last night with my kids and kept the fire going.
Hope all the best for the New Year!
 
You opened people's eyes

You opened people's eyes

BikerTrash said:
Im glad you all opened your hearts and minds to a bigger picture that is often overlooked
It makes me happy and honored that willi would speak the good word about the matter at hand
...i am not a church going man by any means. Just hit me hard this year. Thank you willi for opening eyes and carrying my feelings into your words.....Thank you all for contributing.....
Remimber when life has you down.... theres others who have it worse.....
Click to expand...

Your story made a better Christmas for a lot of people, BT.
 
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