legally separated

  • Thread starter Thread starter mrhtbd
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mrhtbd

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Well, that's under the bridge.
Still living here.
Still trying to get the house and only move once.
Work has been a struggle, very busy but going.
Hitting the gym now 7 times in the past 2 weeks from 5 to 6 AM, then 5 times evenings.
Been working out well, except now I'm down 20 lbs since July 20th.
Oh well, 227 isn't so bad.
Not much skin left to lose.
Haven't been on here much lately.
I guess this will be relegated to the stuff thread.
See you all later...
 
Congrats dude now maybe you can have a piece of mind and be able to gather your thoughts.. As you'll soon find out things are going to be much better this way!
 
Congratulations.

If you are looking for suggestions, I say go get some pussy. If not, have a nice day anyway.
 
Spent 9 hours yesterday finishing the kitchen. Still some left but it looks great.
I asked my kids today why I'm still working on the house when I'll be leaving anyway.
My 11 yr old said, "It's OK, Dad, everywhere we look we will be reminded of how hard you worked for us!"
Made me feel good.
Had a great day with them.
Took them to lunch with my mom's friend from high school.
The lady is 88 and still going strong.
It was meaningful to be with someone who loves me and mine unconditionally.
Then we went to my grad school, which my 6 yr old says she wants to go to and I bought them pullover sweatshirts.
They are both in swimming and leave the pool with too little on.
The 6 yr old already has a cough.
I said, "These are just for going to and from swimming practice." "Nice a warm with full coverage to keep you cosy."
Now it's off to physical therapy for my torn shoulder, then to swimming practice until 9:30 PM."
I love these kids, wouldn't trade them for anything.
 
mrhtbd said:
Yeah, better off separated, we'll see.
Click to expand...

You truely are my friend just wait and see... And as far as the kids go I can certainly relate to what your saying I have 3 of my own and would do anything in the world for either one of them.. There's nothing like the love of a child!!!
 
Problem is I am still living in the house.
I spent 8 hours today finishing the kitchen and hallway trim, then met my kids at the bus, took them out to eat, and spent the last 4 hours at their different swimming practices.
As soon as I walked in the door, wife had some shit to say.
"What do you want," she asked?
What difference does it make, I only told her 50 times and I'm tired of repeating myself. She insisted in engaging me in conversation.
"At this point," I said, "I'd be happy just to get back the money I spent on the materials I purchased just to remodel this house, but that being unlikely, I'll just settle for a hot shower."
I'm here for my kids. I take them to swim practice from 5:30 to 9:30 weeknights while she "works late," whatever.
Can't wait to get out of here, but don't want to leave until things are settled with child custody.
It's risky because she act like a complete ass and it's difficult being even less than I already am.
Probably should get a room somewhere.
Can't afford anything else, hell, just spent $1,400 in the past 3 weeks finishing the construction projects.
You guys were right, I must be crazy.
"Why did you do it," she asked? (Spend the money finishing the kitchen and hallway).
Because of the children," I said, "because I want them to live in a decent place that's finished."
They're screaming, gotta go.
 
mrhtbd said:
Problem is I am still living in the house.
I spent 8 hours today finishing the kitchen and hallway trim, then met my lids at the bus, took them out to eat, and spent the last 4 hours at their different swimming practices.
As soon as I walked in the door, wife had some shit to say.
"What do you want," she asked?
What difference does it make, I only told her 50 times and I'm tired of repeating myself. She insisted in engaging me in conversation.
"At this point," I said, "I'd be happy just to get back the money I spent on the materials I purchased just to remodel this house, but that being unlikely, I'll just settle for a hot shower."
I'm here for my kids. I take them to swim practice from 5:30 to 9:30 weeknights while she "works late," whatever.
Can't wait to get out of here, but don't want to leave until things are settled with child custody.
It's risky because she act like a complete ass and it's difficult being even less than I already am.
Probably should get a room somewhere.
Can't afford anything else, hell, just spent $1,400 in the past 3 weeks finishing the construction projects.
You guys were right, I must be crazy.
"Why did you do it," she asked? (Spend the money finishing the kitchen and hallway).
Because of the children," I said, "because I want them to live in a decent place that's finished."
They're screaming, gotta go.
Click to expand...

Plz resist and dont feed the troll
 
Bro, you are at war and there can only be one winner. Who will it be?!?! You decide!!! ( I've been there and it's a mother fucker, but time will make it easier. Stay busy, stay away from negative people/friends.. Wish ya the best..
 
Bananas said:
Plz resist and dont feed the troll
Click to expand...

Just to clarify, are you referring to me or the wife as a troll?
Not offended, just wondering.
Hell, at this point, not much offends me at all, it's that low.
Still packing my shit for the gym at 5 AM though.
 
mrhtbd said:
Just to clarify, are you referring to me or the wife as a troll?
Not offended, just wondering.
Hell, at this point, not much offends me at all, it's that low.
Still packing my shit for the gym at 5 AM though.
Click to expand...

The way I understood it, he's referring to your wife, feeding the troll by pouring money into the house when you should be saving it for YOU AND THE KIDS, NOT HER OR HER HOUSE!! I may be wrong but that's how I took it dude...
 
Freezerdude said:
The way I understood it, he's referring to your wife, feeding the troll by pouring money into the house when you should be saving it for YOU AND THE KIDS, NOT HER OR HER HOUSE!! I may be wrong but that's how I took it dude...
Click to expand...

nah dude i was talking about MR HTBD, same shit different day, its like dude just keeps doing what he does and keeps talking bout hte same thing, lol.

just joking around Mr HTBD, I dont undberstand but can see your struggle wish could do something to have you see it form someone elses perspective. sometimes we are too close to situation to see what we are doing.
 
zeke said:
Bro, you are at war and there can only be one winner. Who will it be?!?! You decide!!! ( I've been there and it's a mother fucker, but time will make it easier. Stay busy, stay away from negative people/friends.. Wish ya the best..
Click to expand...

I completley and 110% Disagree with this post as in a divorce with Children there is NO Winner or Loser....
The results of that decision affect both parties and the kids,I have been divorced twice and neither time was there a winner.
 
MRHTBD,,,, I know I been a tad ruff on you in other threads and for clarification I dont regret saying what I had on my mind ,
Although from the OP thread it seems you are on the right track now Brother......
Keep your head up .Stay Strong and support them kids the best you can,
Money is less important as is the quality of time you spend with your children .
Proud of you bro for gettin in the right direction ,.
 
Some very good mentoring on this thread and I appreciate it.
My hiatus after the "stuff" thread made me do some serious soul-searching (as to what the fuck am I doing, why, and where do I think it's going to take me)?
Well, if we have to get the house appraised, these last few projects are the finishing touches of 3 1/2 years work of remodeling, so from that perspective, it's a finished job.
The wife called me a "loser" and "failure" three weeks ago, it brought back old fears that I had for never really finishing things, so in that light I am making myself into the man I always wanted to be by finishing this so I can fully move on; finality.
Essencially, the intrinsic value of believing in myself from here on in seemed superior than the few extra bucks I could stash away. (Still out on that one).
Also, if the kids will stay here, and I insist they will because I truly believe it is in their best interest to not have many changes, continue getting her parents support getting them on the bus and back from school (they live 6 houses down) I want a nice place for them to be.
Also somewhere in the back of my mind I figured I let her down somewhere along the line and finishing this could leven the situation (but I was dead wrong on that one, she's worse now than ever). Oh well, so in that light banana was dead on.
Reading what he wrote went right to heart.
I don't want to be an egotistical troll anymore, that brings us to the here and now.
I asked myself, "Without an ego, what is important?"
The answer was clear; "The most important thing in this whole mess is the best interest of the children, and since I am a primary cafe-giver, (as I spend the most quality time with them) it's time for me to step away from my ego and up to the position of father, authority, and protector."
I've taken them to swim practice every night weekdays for the past three weeks. Hell, their mother has only spent 3 days with them away from me since June, but this isn't a competition, it's an important mission requiring me to be healthy, stable (mind, body, and career-wise), and able to put their interests first.
That's my plan, and for all the rest, "the Divel may care!"
And biker, tough love hits the hardest and sticks to your ribs.
It makes you hurt so much inside, because it's meaningful, and to all you guys who helped carry me through the tough period, my darkest days, I bow in humble gratitude!
Now, lemme go tuck those sweeties in!
 
BikerTrash said:
I completley and 110% Disagree with this post as in a divorce with Children there is NO Winner or Loser....
The results of that decision affect both parties and the kids,I have been divorced twice and neither time was there a winner.
Click to expand...

Hey bro, I hear what your saying and you are correct. I guess I should have been more specific. The divorce process can get extremely dirty, I'm sure you can agree and that was where I was going with that, BUT yes when kids are involved it is hard. I was a part time dad, not by choice and it was tough on me and my kids...
Anyway I'm glad on this board we can respectfully agree that sometimes we may disagree :-)
Cheers,
 
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