New thing I'm doing in the gym

Darkness

Darkness

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Apr 29, 2011
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For years I've been farting in place at the equipment I'm using during and between sets. Tonight, I had a great idea... Each time I hard to fart (about 39 times), I walked halfway across the gym, away from the equipment I was using, and stood in the area where I would not be. There and only there did I release fart gas. Once all the gas was carefully expelled, I returned gracefully to the area in which I was training, and immediately commenced the next set.

I'm brilliant. I shall continue this forever.
 
I prefer what's referred to as the crop dusting method. Walk slowly and release the gas as you go. That way it spreads the joy. I especially like to do it when walking past a hot chick in spandex on a bike or elliptical thing. Then as all the guys walk by checking out her butt they smell the fart and get this disgusted look on their face.
The worst thing is farting when doing squats. There's no escape. You own that one.
And I have to express my admiration for you D. 39 times is awe inspiring. I am humbled in your presence, Sir!
 
Thanks buf. It's quite an accomplishment. My dad said I'd never amount to anything but look at me now...
 
Darkness said:
For years I've been farting in place at the equipment I'm using during and between sets. Tonight, I had a great idea... Each time I hard to fart (about 39 times), I walked halfway across the gym, away from the equipment I was using, and stood in the area where I would not be. There and only there did I release fart gas. Once all the gas was carefully expelled, I returned gracefully to the area in which I was training, and immediately commenced the next set.

I'm brilliant. I shall continue this forever.
Click to expand...

I've used this method of gas expulsion for years. Buf's method is great in crowed bars and at wedding receptions.
 
Owning the gym makes this exercise a little easier for me. I can casually walk into my office, release said gas and go back out. The cool part is watching my wife stroll in there after a few minutes, and then eye fuck me from across the gym!
 
Why so secretive about dropping ass.........I can be speaking with anyone in the gym, give a slight lean off to the side and rip a loud one and not miss a beat in our conversation. The look on his/her face is priceless..........I wonder why no one talks to me anymore?
 
I was in a hurry to get out of the house yesterday evening so I ate hot dogs with saur kraut. I had some of the smelliest farts in a long time. I usually eat clean, everything proportioned.
One time, around 2:30 am I got up to pee, let one rip as I was beginning to pee, it takes me a while to pee, and my eyes were burning from it and the whole bathroom smelled like rotten eggs.
I'm still stinking this morning. I'm going to stink up my office and call my secretary in for a meeting. That should get a ride out of her. Rise, not ride. Well, maybe a ride too but not from the smell.
 
Glycomann said:
I only fart in bed with my wife and in my office.
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I've had is so bad in my office, even I had to leave.

about 3 hours after Oatmeal & eggs, I'm wicked for a good 30 minutes then its off to the toilet or the next one is gonna leave a mark.
 
I've been doing this for years to get rid of dumbasses that wanna hover around to ask stupid questions and watch
 
When I want to use a piece of equipment so bad I'll crop dust the area first...guaranteed to scatter the dweebs ;)
 
my partner and I would ride together to work playing the fart game for years.. he bought this newer truck one time where he could lock all the widows in the up position... so I just had to endure...

got my paybacks though.. pickled onions with mini egg rolls... even having all windows down didn't help.
darkness, your wasting those gasious clouds... do what buff does.. share those dead puppies
 
basskiller said:
my partner and I would ride together to work playing the fart game for years.. he bought this newer truck one time where he could lock all the widows in the up position... so I just had to endure...

got my paybacks though.. pickled onions with mini egg rolls... even having all windows down didn't help.
darkness, your wasting those gasious clouds... do what buff does.. share those dead puppies
Click to expand...

This is hero material right here fellas
 
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