Question My Wife Asked

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bufbiker

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I guess it was Sunday evening, we had been at my youngest sons house seeing the grandkids. The wife was going through the pictures we took on her phone. She looked over at me and asked me "Why do you have to be so big?" Why do I need to be so big?
I told her that I'm not that big, so she showed me some of the pictures of me next to other people, my two sons in particular. Now my oldest son is like 5'7", 135lbs and ripped to the bone at 5% body fat. My youngest son is 6', 245lbs. They both looked very small compared to me in the picture.
(I weighed 280lbs at the Dr on Tuesday by the way.)
But when I was around them I felt like they were much bigger than they are and I was much smaller than I am.
I told my wife that when I look in the mirror I see a small guy, and when I'm around other people I feel small, even when they are calling me big man, etc. She told me I'm twice as big as I was when I got out of prison the last time, 20 years ago. I think I was about 180-185lbs back then.
I guess I have a case of muscle dysmorphia or something. I just have this strange compulsion to get bigger, stronger continually.
Not sure what she was getting at. She says touching me, hugging me etc is like hugging a rock I'm so hard all over.
So not sure of the point of her question, but I do see that at some point it needs to stop. But where is that point? 300lbs body weight? Benching 700, squatting 900?
 
Our loved ones see us in completely different way then we see ourselves.

A big part of the reason I finally came off is when my wife said something to me about it.

I hope this works out for you

A lot of us suffer from some type of body image complex myself included.
 
I don't think we can stop. I think it's our nature. I think we stop when we have that final catastrophic injury but as long as we can move our legs and arms we will be in the gym doing something. I think this is the nature of a man. Guys that don't go to the gym probably 3/4 of the time have some other thing they obsess about, cars, bikes, other sports, job, career, his private business. That is the nature of a man. Women can not understand this but women are sometimes a conundrum onto themselves. She may say your muscles are too hard or this or that but she is attracted to that man with the hard muscles, the quickness to solve problems, the wise tenderness and reassuredness you provide. It's a package deal. When some shithead at the autoshop gives you a good deal and fixes your car right the first time it's because he fears your presence she benefits. While she doesn't always acknowledge it she knows it. Once in a great while when she thinks you're not looking you will catch her admiring you. She has the package.

And by the way, from what I read these past 8-10 months you are essentially doing pretty close to HRT. That will make you live longer and stronger and you're probably being more responsible than you have for a while. And my wife says the same stupid shit.
 
I agree completely. 300 pound bodyweight, 700 bench, and 900 squat. Raw of course, lol.

Truth be known I think our wives obsess about their appearance more than we do. And it really bothers them when they feel themselves aging and losing their attractiveness and meanwhile we are still getting looks from the opposite sex and looking better than ever.
 
It's a thing all of us seem to have. It's the only sport where perfect isn't good enough. But there's definitely a price tag on all this.
 
1bigun11 said:
I agree completely. 300 pound bodyweight, 700 bench, and 900 squat. Raw of course, lol.

Truth be known I think our wives obsess about their appearance more than we do. And it really bothers them when they feel themselves aging and losing their attractiveness and meanwhile we are still getting looks from the opposite sex and looking better than ever.
Click to expand...

There it is brother!!! I have to agree you hit the nail on the head!! I just got back from 11 days at the beach and my wife was jealous and half mad the entire time we was there simply because every time we walked on the beach I was getting looks from everyone even all the men.. One day while walking on the beach my wife said don't you ever get tired of everyone staring at you all the time and why do they do it, I said have you not noticed what kind of shape everyone is in? I was one of a small handful of people that was even closed to being in shape and needless to say by the end of the trip she was sick of all the little young ladies in their 20's turning to check out the old man in his late 40's! lol, I love it myself...
 
nothing wrong with that. be the big teddy bear and love her the way she deserves and she'll be alright. the thing is, women always look for things to complain about. if it wasnt your size, I'm sure it'd be about something else.
Imagine you were 145 and her seeing you struggling to install an AC in 104 degree summer. 280 wins all day and now tell her to shave your back.:iggthumpu
 
Nothing wrong with wanting to be bigger and stronger man. As long as your health is good do what you want to do. Like lifts said.
 
lol, I get the same shit...... I stand at the ferry with maybe between 500-700 people and I am 6' 285lbs and I am looked at all the time. Its normal now but its funny when guys I work with call me big man or shit like that. I am so used to being big I do not feel it at all..
 
1bigun11 said:
I agree completely. 300 pound bodyweight, 700 bench, and 900 squat. Raw of course, lol.

Truth be known I think our wives obsess about their appearance more than we do. And it really bothers them when they feel themselves aging and losing their attractiveness and meanwhile we are still getting looks from the opposite sex and looking better than ever.
Click to expand...

Way off course here but I know when I want to get my Old Lady all warmed up and ready for sex , I turn on the computer and let her stare at BigGuns Avitar pic....then shes all hot and bothered...WoooHoooooo,she like a untammed lioness
 
My wife just asked me this morning somewhat the same question. i started another routine & she seen me doing my morning shake and asked me to try get any bigger. i'm lost. i don't see me any different than anyone else. My work even comments on my size but i don't see it.
 
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