- Joined
- Sep 11, 2004
- Messages
- 6,655
A FATHER PASSING BY HIS SON'S BEDROOM WAS ASTONISHED TO SEE THE
BED WAS NICELY MADE AND EVERYTHING WAS PICKED UP. THEN HE SAW AN
ENVELOPE PROPPED UP PROMINENTLY ON THE CENTER OF THE BED. IT WAS
ADDRESSED, "DAD." WITH THE WORST PREMONITION, HE OPENED THE ENVELOPE
AND READ THE LETTER WITH TREMBLING HANDS:
DEAR DAD:
IT IS WITH GREAT REGRET AND SORROW THAT I'M WRITING THIS.
I HAD TO ELOPE WITH MY NEW
GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE I WANTED TO AVOID A
SCENE WITH MOM AND YOU. I'VE BEEN FINDING REAL PASSION WITH BARBARA AND
SHE IS SO NICE EVEN WITH ALL HER PIERCINGS, TATTOOS, AND HER TIGHT
MOTORCYCLE CLOTHES.
BUT IT'S NOT ONLY THE PASSION DAD, SHE'S PREGNANT AND BARBARA SAID
THAT WE
WILL BE VERY HAPPY TOGETHER EVEN THOUGH YOU WON'T CARE FOR HER, AS
SHE IS MUCH
OLDER THAN I, SHE ALREADY OWNS A TRAILER IN THE WOODS AND HAS A
STACK OF FIREWOOD FOR THE WHOLE WINTER. SHE WANTS TO HAVE MANY MORE
CHILDREN WITH ME AND THAT'S NOW ONE OF MY DREAMS TOO.
BARBARA TAUGHT ME THAT MARIJUANA DOESN'T REALLY HURT ANYONE AND
WE'LL BE GROWING IT FOR OURSELVES AND TRADING IT WITH HER FRIENDS
FOR ALL THE COCAINE AND ECSTASY (woo hoo ) WE WANT. IN THE MEANTIME,
WE'LL PRAY THAT SCIENCE WILL FIND A
CURE FOR AIDS SO BARBARA CAN GET
BETTER; SHE SURE DESERVES IT!! DON'T WORRY DAD; I'M 15 YEARS OLD
NOW AND I KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.
SOMEDAY I'M SURE WE'LL BE BACK TO VISIT SO YOU CAN GET TO KNOW
YOUR GRANDCHILDREN .
YOUR SON,
Bill
P.S.
DAD, NONE OF THIS IS TRUE. I'M OVER AT THE NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE.
I JUST WANTED TO REMIND YOU THAT THERE ARE WORSE THINGS IN LIFE THAN
MY REPORT CARD THAT'S IN MY DESK, CENTER DRAWER. I LOVE YOU!
CALL WHEN IT'S SAFE FOR ME TO COME HOME.
:flute: :flute:
BED WAS NICELY MADE AND EVERYTHING WAS PICKED UP. THEN HE SAW AN
ENVELOPE PROPPED UP PROMINENTLY ON THE CENTER OF THE BED. IT WAS
ADDRESSED, "DAD." WITH THE WORST PREMONITION, HE OPENED THE ENVELOPE
AND READ THE LETTER WITH TREMBLING HANDS:
DEAR DAD:
IT IS WITH GREAT REGRET AND SORROW THAT I'M WRITING THIS.
I HAD TO ELOPE WITH MY NEW
GIRLFRIEND BECAUSE I WANTED TO AVOID A
SCENE WITH MOM AND YOU. I'VE BEEN FINDING REAL PASSION WITH BARBARA AND
SHE IS SO NICE EVEN WITH ALL HER PIERCINGS, TATTOOS, AND HER TIGHT
MOTORCYCLE CLOTHES.
BUT IT'S NOT ONLY THE PASSION DAD, SHE'S PREGNANT AND BARBARA SAID
THAT WE
WILL BE VERY HAPPY TOGETHER EVEN THOUGH YOU WON'T CARE FOR HER, AS
SHE IS MUCH
OLDER THAN I, SHE ALREADY OWNS A TRAILER IN THE WOODS AND HAS A
STACK OF FIREWOOD FOR THE WHOLE WINTER. SHE WANTS TO HAVE MANY MORE
CHILDREN WITH ME AND THAT'S NOW ONE OF MY DREAMS TOO.
BARBARA TAUGHT ME THAT MARIJUANA DOESN'T REALLY HURT ANYONE AND
WE'LL BE GROWING IT FOR OURSELVES AND TRADING IT WITH HER FRIENDS
FOR ALL THE COCAINE AND ECSTASY (woo hoo ) WE WANT. IN THE MEANTIME,
WE'LL PRAY THAT SCIENCE WILL FIND A
CURE FOR AIDS SO BARBARA CAN GET
BETTER; SHE SURE DESERVES IT!! DON'T WORRY DAD; I'M 15 YEARS OLD
NOW AND I KNOW HOW TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.
SOMEDAY I'M SURE WE'LL BE BACK TO VISIT SO YOU CAN GET TO KNOW
YOUR GRANDCHILDREN .
YOUR SON,
Bill
P.S.
DAD, NONE OF THIS IS TRUE. I'M OVER AT THE NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE.
I JUST WANTED TO REMIND YOU THAT THERE ARE WORSE THINGS IN LIFE THAN
MY REPORT CARD THAT'S IN MY DESK, CENTER DRAWER. I LOVE YOU!
CALL WHEN IT'S SAFE FOR ME TO COME HOME.
:flute: :flute:
