DADAWG
Vet
- Joined
- May 15, 2004
- Messages
- 3,096
One for the ladies
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1. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take
to do
the dishes?
- Both of them.
2. Why did the man cross the road?
- He heard the chicken was a slut.
3. Why don't women blink during foreplay?
- They don't have time.
4. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
- They don't stop and ask for directions.
5. How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
- He buys two cases of beer.
6. What is the difference between men and government bonds?
- The bonds mature.
7. Why are blonde jokes so short?
- Because men can remember them.
8. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
- We don't know; it has never happened.
9. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good
looking?
- They all already have boyfriends.
10.What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
- A widow.
11.When do you care for a man's company?
- When he owns it.
12.Why are married women heavier than single women?
- Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
13.How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
- Tape the remote control between his toes.
14.What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
- They're married.
15. Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?" God
says:
"So you would love her." "But God," the man says, "why did you make her
so
dumb?" God says: "So she would love you."
i stole this from mudge
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1. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take
to do
the dishes?
- Both of them.
2. Why did the man cross the road?
- He heard the chicken was a slut.
3. Why don't women blink during foreplay?
- They don't have time.
4. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
- They don't stop and ask for directions.
5. How does a man show that he is planning for the future?
- He buys two cases of beer.
6. What is the difference between men and government bonds?
- The bonds mature.
7. Why are blonde jokes so short?
- Because men can remember them.
8. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
- We don't know; it has never happened.
9. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good
looking?
- They all already have boyfriends.
10.What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
- A widow.
11.When do you care for a man's company?
- When he owns it.
12.Why are married women heavier than single women?
- Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.
13.How do you get a man to do sit-ups?
- Tape the remote control between his toes.
14.What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
- They're married.
15. Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?" God
says:
"So you would love her." "But God," the man says, "why did you make her
so
dumb?" God says: "So she would love you."
i stole this from mudge
